What is breadcrumbing in dating and are you a victim of this wicked AF trend?
When the “crush” has no intentions of taking things further, but they like the attention. So they flirt here or there, send dm/texts just to keep the person interested, knowing damn well they’re staying single. –The Urban Dictionary
Is someone breadcrumbing you? How to find out if this not-so-new dating technique that narcissists use is happening to you and what you can do about it
Why are you being breadcrumbed?
Rather than just disappearing and refusing to talk to you as in ‘Ghosting’ or ‘slow-fading’, breadcrumbing is what someone does when they are just using you and want to keep you hanging on by a thread.
A breadcrumber only gives enough of themselves to keep you on the hook and never to satisfy you emotionally or sexually. New-fashioned slang for leading you on.
People, both male, and female use breadcrumbing to keep you on the hook, either to make themselves feel desirable and popular or to get favors from you, like rides, money, meals, etc.
Breadcrumbers send you dopamine reinforcing signals that make you addicted to anticipating the reward.
It is totally selfish behavior and sure to lead to a destructive and toxic relationship if it isn’t changed or nipped in the bud.
How you can tell if they are breadcrumbing you
- You get hot and cold messages and signals, They act interested one moment and then ghost you the next
- There is no authentic or deep conversation
- They use different ways to throw out the breadcrumbs; a message on Instagram, a text, and then a contact on Facebook Messenger
- They booty call you late at night
- They flirt with you when you are with them, but then never contact you again
- They don’t respond or acknowledge some of your messages, but then hit you up out of the blue when they need something
- They may show signs of passive-aggressive behavior, won’t let you go completely, and never show their true feelings.
What to do if someone is breadcrumbing you
Never blame yourself.
Instead, confront them, call the practice out by name and condemn it.
And simply stop deciding to accept the bait. The breadcrumber will usually move on to easier prey or seek to establish a more authentic and real relationship.